I have carried several pistols as issued weapons. Being 'forced' to carry a specific firearm makes you concentrate on the negatives of that pistol and "hate" them.
But, I would carry any of them as EDC. The point is find what works for YOU. That's the biggest issue with female shooters; everyone tells them what to carry and they concentrate on what they don't like about the weapon and use it as an excuse to not carry it.
Go find a big gun store. Walk the counter and ask to finger ***** every single pistol you can get your hands on. Identify what you like and what you don't. Ask politely if someone can remove the trigger safety (most places will remove the slide/barrel assembly then remove the trigger lock) so you can try the trigger. Once you find a couple you like, find a friend or a range that has them for "rent" and put some rounds through them.
I honestly don't give a ***** about what round is best for self defense. You need to carry what you are comfortable with and what you can control. I carry .380, 9mm, 38/.357 and .45; situation dictates. I prefer 9mm as it typically gives you more rounds for the weapon. Lets be realistic; there is almost ZERO chance you are putting the first round on target in a self defense situation. That adrenaline rush and shock factor guarantees it. This is just another reason to train, train, train. Average 9mm compact carries 15rds (some more, some less). So that's 15 opportunities to persuade the aggressor to change their mind. Everyone's answer is "carry more mags!!" But how many people practice speed reloads/mag changes? How many people train to cound rds to know when they are about to run dry? How many train to take cover to conduct mag changes?
Realistic, honest real world based training will make you proficient with any firearm you choose to carry. Except a Desert Eagle. No one ever becomes expedient with a Deagle.